The Worst Week, Part 2

About a month ago, it felt like there was a rock in my throat.  Ever since I had my tonsils out when I was 16 I frequently have swollen glands and lymph nodes, but this was different.  It was difficult to swallow.  I made a comment about it at our RS presidency meeting and they cautioned me that I should have that checked out right away.  That freaked me out enough to get to the dr that afternoon.  He immediately ordered an ultrasound for the next day.  They read the report the following Monday (my birthday) and said I needed to come in for a follow up, but the dr was out all week.  Well, I couldn't wait a week so I called an endocrinologist who got me in that day.  She did a second ultrasound and decided I had a nodule on my thyroid and it needed to be biopsied.  She told me to wait 20 minutes while she cleared her patients and came back and did the biospy (via FNA) right then.  Nothing like celebrating your 34th birthday with a biopsy!

The first biopsy came back indeterminate.  At that point, they send some of the fluid off for a second test (this is a genetic test that can better tell if it is benign or malignant), however they didn't get enough of a sample from the first biopsy to do that, so I had to go in for a second biopsy.

We were driving home from Slidell when I got the news from my doctor that the results from the genetic test came back showing the nodule was "suspicious for cancer."  Honestly, after the previous days, I think I was a bit numb and took the news fairly well.  It is a bit weird to think about it randomly throughout the day and think about cancer being there.  However, the good news is that in the hierarchy of cancers, I am fairly certain it is pretty low on the totem pole.  I will go in on the 25th to meet with the surgeon and get surgery scheduled then.

So all-in-all it has been a pretty tough week.

 

This is Wilma.  I named it.

The Worst Week, Part 1

After the night we had on the 4th of July we were ready to get home and try and get back to a normal routine.  Wednesday morning I got up and went straight to the office to start catching up on all my work.  Like normal, Lucy woke up and I got her a waffle and juice and she came up to eat her breakfast and watch Disney Jr. under my desk.  Shortly after, Jeremy came up to start work.  I had commented to him about how I barely got any sleep because Lucy had come down in the middle of the night and she is a dang heater.  He commented back that he had barely slept either, but he wasn't sure why.  He just kept waking up with a weird feeling.  Just then he hopped up and said he had to take a call.  I just assumed it was his boss or an important client. 

I will never in my life forget the next moments of our lives.  I have never seen Jeremy in so much pain and panic and despair, and I hope we never again have to experience that kind of emotion.  A couple minutes later Jeremy ran into the room.  He was crying and hyperventilating and I everything happened so fast I can't remember what all was said, I just remember him saying his mom had found his dad and I was screaming, "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! WHAT HAPPENED?  WHAT HAPPENED?!".  Worst moment of our lives.

So what did happen was that Jeremy's dad had liver cancer a couple years ago.  They removed part of his liver and he was in remission.  We had no idea he hadn't been feeling well for over 5 months.  He seemed fine when we saw him at Easter.  And we talked to him fairly frequently.  But apparently he had been feeling tired and weak and he passed away in his sleep.  We opted not to have an autopsy done, but they told us they were certain his liver was probably severely damaged and he passed away from liver failure.

We raced to do laundry that we still hadn't done from our trip to Beaumont/Galveston, re-packed the car, made a quick trip to mom and dad's to give them all the produce I had just bought at the store, filled up on gas and left at 4 am to get to Slidell.  The next two days were spent scouring Jeremy's mom's house for his dad's will.  He had mentioned to us numerous times that he had a will and it spelled out exactly who got what, so we knew it had to be there somewhere.  Finally I asked if anyone had checked the desk in his room (I thought it had drawers)- they had been looking in the garage in all of his things.  They went back in the room and found it on the bookshelf next to the desk!  It was such a moment of relief. 

We honored his father's wishes and had him cremated without any type of memorial or service.  I almost feel like it was better/easier/somehow less painful that way.  I can't imagine the pain and agony one of us would have endured trying to figure out what to say.  I am quite positive Jeremy would not have been able to make it through. 

Jeremy and Kevin went through everything and divided it up according to the will. Sunday night my mom flew into New Orleans and helped me drive the girls home.  It was a long drive and I am so thankful my mom was there to help.  I am sure I couldn't have done it without her.

Jeremy packed his dad's car full- which included not only his dad's ashes but his grandfather's as well- and drove it home the next day.  It has been a hard week trying to sort though records and make decisions.  Harder still to sort through belongings and realize just how much Jeremy was like his dad.  They were both incredibly sentimental- like keeping all his concert tickets, the sasparilla root beer bottle from when they went to the fair in Jackson, keeping every single card, picture, and letter from the girls.

Each day it has gotten a smidgen easier, though I don't think it will ever be ok.  My heart breaks for Jeremy and the pain he is enduring having lost his dad, especially unexpectedly.  I only pray he knows what a wonderful son he is and that his dad loved him and was proud of him.

 

Eventful Weekend

I feel like I can sum up the long weekend in three main events:

1) Lilly's 8th Birthday and Baptism

This was the whole reason we went down to Beaumont.  My niece Lilly turned 8 and was baptized.  All the cousins had tons of fun.  We stayed up way too late every night and the kids were always exhausted but happy.  Lilly had a beautiful baptism and we are so proud of her!

2) Lucy almost died.

Sunday night, just as we were winding down for the night and about to say goodbyes, Lucy, who was sitting right next to me, made a loud gagging sound. I jumped and turned and she spit out this large white button she had been playing with.  But she had that panic look in her eyes and I could tell she wasn't breathing.  I screamed that she was choking, and Jeremy and my sister grabbed her.  Jeremy swiped her throat and Brianne was hitting her on the back.  I was just sitting in the background screaming to help her.  When all was said and done she was ok.  Jeremy swears he felt something else in her throat when he swiped it, but she either swallowed it or he just felt her tooth or something in the craziness of sticking his finger in her mouth.  It scared all of us- to the point that my sister's father-in-law (who had a heart attack not that long ago) grabbed his nitro pills in case he had another heart attack.

3) Fourth of July in Galveston and Traumatizing the Girls 

We left Beaumont early Monday morning and went to Galveston.  We had a great time at the beach, and then at the hotel pool.  We ate a quick dinner and then caught the parade- which the girls loved because they got lots of beads.  We decided to watch the fireworks from the beach right in front of our hotel.   Just before they started, Lucy had to go potty (of course!), so Jeremy took her back up to the lobby.  The fireworks started soon after but these teenagers kept shooting off fireworks behind us, and when they would light them it would send the ashes scattering across the sand right to our towel.   We would have to jump up to avoid getting burned.  It was freaking Joey out, and Jeremy was taking a long time getting back, so we decided to just get up and go find him.  Just as we reached the top of the stairs from the beach to the sidewalk I heard two guys start yelling at each other and cursing.  Immediately I grabbed the girls and held them back from stepping onto the sidewalk.  Then one of the men grabbed a beer bottle and broke it and started attacking the other guy.  In front of us.  I yelled at the girls to get back down the stairs- I think I even may have carried them down.  I can't remember.  After a few minutes it seemed to have settled so we walked back up and saw some people around an old man lying on the ground.  He had gotten caught in the scuffle and pushed down and broke his leg.  Then one of the guys involved in the fight came back over with his neck slashed and he was covered in blood.  At this point the girls were screaming and crying so we got across the street in time to for Jeremy to walk up with Lucy.  Apparently he had been standing right there at the top of the stairs with Lucy, but the fireworks the teenage boys were shooting were freaking her out so he went back across the street.  We were really so lucky to have been unharmed in all of it.  The girls were traumatized though.  They cried so hard and for such a long time in the hotel room.  Joey was so sweet and asked if we could say a prayer to help them get calmed down.  Such a shame that we had such a good day only for it to be ruined by morons and alcohol.

The view from our room once all the police arrived.  Don't know if we should have stuck around to give them our account of what happened but it didn't matter.  First priority was getting the girls away and calming them down.